One small change today will build a strong foundation in your life. The blame game does not work in personal development, business or entrepreneurship. Lets look at steps to help you change your outcome in life:
- Determine what went wrong and how the situation went wrong
- Take the fault of the situation – the only way you can change the situation is if you are in control
- Now that you have taken fault, take control – how can you make the situation better
- Create action steps on how you will make the situation better – this can be list format or more education in a specific topic
- Put those action steps into play – repeat until you get the outcome you desire
Let’s play this out in a situation many would say they are not at fault and another person/thing is. These micro situations happen daily and people just move on with their lives thinking there is nothing more to grow from.
Personal Victim Situation: I want to lose a few pounds, but I can’t because my wife does the grocery shopping, cooking, and I don’t have time to go to the gym. These external factors are showing I can’t really lose weight because my world is basically set for me. I wake up, go to work, come home, and this vicious cycle repeats itself. Then on the weekend, we have some family event and a honey do list – so there is no time to focus on losing weight.
Taking Control of the Situation: I want to lose a few pounds. Normally, my wife does all the grocery shopping, but I am going to make a list or some healthy alternatives so I can have a balanced diet of proteins, carbs, and fats. Actually, I am going to take this one step further and go with her grocery shopping so she can see I am serious about losing this weight. Normally, she will cook a homemade meals from her favorite recipes, but now I need to teach her about how I want to be eating. Energy is still a factor in my time schedule which makes it hard to make it to the gym, but I am going to take the first stepping stone, by eating a more balanced meal. I did not put this weight on in a day, I know I have to stay consistent to lose the weight and maintain a healthy diet.
The concept seems so easy when you can clearly pick out how to fix the situation. I am going to give you a personal situation I felt was extremely hard for me to say I was at fault, but when the statistics came back it was 100% true.
I grew up playing competitive soccer. Every game was recorded so the coach could go back, see plays we missed or how we could improve. After a few games, he was tired of his hours of coaching going right out the window when we stepped on the field. This game was different for him. He wanted each goal scored on us to be a clear understanding that it started the second we lost control.
Keep in mind, we are teenaged girls and there was obviously quite the team drama after spending more time together in a rough losing season than with our family or friends. The egos on our team were beginning to tear us apart even more than losing because it was clearly visible on the field.
Coach watched for a goal to be scored (on us, sadly)! Then walked back through the steps when we lost control, who was involved with the play and how the other team passes us and how we could have stopped it. I played left mid-field at this point, who preferred playing more forward. We got into this group meeting, I thought I was going to be clean from any goals beginning with me, because I made sure to come back and play on defense.
First goal, I wasn’t involved. The ball never made it to our side of the field. Second goal, my coach started his sentence with “Megan” and my stomach dropped. In my head, I was like there is no way I took control of the game by getting the ball from the other team.
I forgot about when I went to pass the ball and my teammate was not defender free and she lost control. That happened because I was more focused on me and not being able to keep the ball long enough for her to free up some space from the defender.
Ouch, talk about a blow to your ego!
Thankfully this story has a happy ending and the egos were clearly deflated as he made it very clear we were all susceptible to losing control, but the only way we could grow is by knowing where we went wrong. If that took him being the bad guy, he was ok with that so we could close out that season as friends and have a little winning streak to balance out that season!
Even when you think there isn’t a way to take fault, try as many situations as you can on how you could have changed that situation in order to make sure you maintained control and had a better outcome. You can use this method of thinking to grow your results regarding personal development, business or entrepreneurship.
We often forget how finding the root cause of a problem and changing it will grow ourselves tremendously.
Go out there, take fault, and take control!
About the Author:
Megan Galane is an accountability coach who specializes with overwhelmed online business owners who need clarification and systems to grow. She is the host of Refuse Defeat Podcast where successful business owners of all industries share their largest business failure and how they overcame it. Megan than takes these failures and transforms them into easy to follow blogs to make sure the listener/reader has all the necessary steps to learn from someone else’s mistakes! www.megangalane.com
You can also read: How to unlock your Potential.